Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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