Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
