hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
