honey bunches of taint.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
