I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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