Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
the condom got lost in my hair
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
pray to the hookup gods
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
