Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
