belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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