they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
