One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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