I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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