the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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