i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
