oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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