I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize