I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
