he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
if only i could text you this smell
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
