so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
