Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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