Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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