i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
