Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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