I must be too annoying 4 u.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
