: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize