Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Randomize
