you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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