Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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