i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
