Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Barsexuality is the new black.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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