Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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