just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
