That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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