you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
