This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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