Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
