Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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