I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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