Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize
