to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
