After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
