I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
