Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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