But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I am naked and annoyed.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
