I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
