Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
