They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
People with herpes should wear stickers.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Randomize
