I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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