So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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