Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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