brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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